March 14th, 2013

Understanding Engineers..!!

> Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one
> said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied,
> "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a
> beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all
> her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first engineer nodded
> approvingly and said, "Good choice: The clothes probably wouldn't have fit
> you anyway."
> Understanding Engineers #2
> To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is
> half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
> Understanding Engineers #3
> A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
> particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with those
> guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" The doctor chimed in,
> "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!" The priest said, "Here
> comes the greens-keeper. Let's have a word with him." He said, "Hello
> George, What's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow,
> aren't they?" The greens-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind
> firemen. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year,
> so we always let them play for free anytime!." The group fell silent for a
> moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer
> for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my
> ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything she can do for them."
> The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"
> Understanding Engineers #4

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Вы меня любите?.. Пока лишь раздеваю...

От девственности я вас излечу...

И долго будем стоя целоваться?...

Я вам не эхо - дважды отдаваться!..

В носу вы ковырялись энергичней...

Вы сразу в позу?.. А поговорить?...

Нет, в этой позе только после свадьбы...

Мне в этой позе муж не разрешает...

А этот акт я посвящаю мужу!..

Ну, я ей муж, а вас что заставляет?..

Маньяк для бабушки - последняя надежда...

Любовь прошла, а куст ещё качался...